REVIEW: The Zombie’s Survival Guide: Thrive In The Zombie Apocalypse After You Turn by: Calvin A. L. Miller II

We’ve done all kinds of reviews for Zombie Survival Guides, How to live like a king after the outbreak, How to fight zombies, and even one previous guide of how to survive as a zombie. That being the case it wouldn’t be fair for you to not have this flip side of how to live as a zombie. The previous guide is quite different from this one though it’s just as enjoyable.

I have only one real complaint about this guide and I’ll throw it out to you up front so I don’t have to focus on it – it’s too short and I felt both images and blank pages were used near the end to lengthen it. Aside from that it’s a fun (and hilarious read.)

The guide is written in a point of view style by an intelligent zombie. There are multiple ‘classes‘ of zombies and they range from your casual mentally challenged horde all the way to those that are nearly as intelligent as the ‘Healthies‘ (see: those that are still among the living.) While the higher functioning zombies have the intelligence to write this they no longer have the ability to actually write these type of guides. Fortunately for them there are plenty of healthy humans willing to write for them, at least on the threat of writing it or being eaten. (Granted they still were turned into late night snacks after the fact but the poor saps still had some kind of hope going for them, suckers.)

The guide though is for those who were just turned into a zombie. It’s meant for those who need help adjusting to their new unlife as well as those entrepreneurs who want to work ahead on preparing for turning into a zombie. It has a great guide on how best to have your body set to be safer when you turn into the zombie as well as a chance to have a higher mental stability. It does of course involve being infected, wearing a skin tight biker suit or equivalent, and have a room stockpiled with meth. Apparently it ‘kick starts’ your brain into functioning mostly normal as one of the undead.

As one of the intelligent zombies it will show you how to track down humans, keep your intelligence running high, deal with a rotting body, and both avoiding hordes as well as attempting to use them and other classes of lower zombies to your advantage. It’s a one stop shop for the undead who wants it all: brains, blood, and beauty – well maybe not the beauty. There’s really only so much you can do with the rotting corpse that you now call your body.

On a side note not only is the writing hilarious and mostly error free but the art by Alan Gandy is amazingly well done. It fits in with the feel of the entire guide on a page per page instance. Truly this is a guide for anyone looking to turn into one of the undead when the end of the world comes AND how to, apparently, stay intelligent as well.

Available at Amazon and Barnes and Noble.