Mmm mmm dried zombie skin. That just sounds lovely doesn’t it? Personally between not being a cannibal and I’m never one for trusting that zombie anything has been sterilized this just seems like a bad idea. I mean either you’re willing to eat people or chance turning into one of the walking dead. (C’mon folks this isn’t made from REAL zombies. You trust them… right?)

Eat their flesh for a change.

There’s that old saying: If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. But how does this apply to the zombie invasion, you’re wondering. Well, let’s just say that people will run out of food before the zombies do. So, why not do like the zombies and eat your enemy. That’s right: cook and eat the zombies! Or, maybe, just munch on some Edible Dried Zombie Skin.

Now, before you undead rights activists get all mad, Edible Dried Zombie Skin isn’t really made out of zombies. It’s actually crunchy dried seaweed. And it’s delicious! It’s all natural, gluten free, and perfect for vegans (no people parts – promise). Just make sure to eat Edible Dried Zombie Skin out of the bag; that way you’ll get all the tastiness of the “skin” and all the joy out of the funny looks of others

Available at Think Geek.

Chocolate Zombie Bunny

Nothing quite says Easter like the Easter Bunny! Hopping around, bringing his candy filled eggs to the masses! Often though some forget that there is a far more sinister meaning for Easter. Easter is a holiday meant to celebrate the time one of the first zombies was able to come back from the dead and release a plague upon the Earth trying to cause others to eat and drink of his life so that they too would return from the dead. Yes Easter is when people celebrate the first zombie, Jesus Christ. Think Geek decided to take the combination of this scary zombie and mix it with the heartfelt, ever loving Easter Bunny in this delicious treat! Well it would be delicious if you enjoy white chocolate. Sadly I don’t or I’d have one of these bad boys on order yesterday!

Spring has sprung and all the little woodland creatures are… screaming and hippity-hopping for their lives? It’s a zombie bunny, and double-bopping him on the head isn’t going to stop his murderous rampage. This is no ordinary rabbit! It’s the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on! He’s not going to nibble your bum; he’s going to tear you limb from limb with his nasty, pointy teeth.

It’s a good thing the virus turned his flesh to delicious white chocolate. All you need to do is sneak up on him (easier said than done, we’ve lost several warehouse monkeys to rabbit attacks) and once you’ve nabbed him, take him out quickly. Use your teeth, brave Knight! Grasp the rabbit firmly in your hands, shove his head in your mouth, and behead him with a single chomp.

The cleverest amongst you may notice this item was one of our gag products for April Fools. Problem is the gaggle of regular chocolate bunnies usually available for mid-morning snacks at the ThinkGeek office somehow became infected with a deadly T-Virus. Rather than allowing these delicious infected rabbits to rampage and attack the ThinkGeek staff we decided to ship them to your house… thus turning April Fools into reality. Please enjoy.

Available at Think Geek!

Hungry? How About Some Zombie Jerky!

I know in the back of your mind you’ve always wondered what zombies taste like. I don’t know if you think it’ll turn you into a zombie or you are just hungry from the food shortages after the outbreak but I know the thought is there. Now though someone has come up with a way that is ‘safe’ to eat the undead!

So you’ve destroyed the brains of your first zombie. Congrats! But now what? What do you do with the festering, rotting body? It was just this question that plagued (get it?) us at TG Zombie Defense HQ. We thought about mailing them to someone we didn’t like, but that was just too costly (and he had already been zombified, anyways). After a lot of discussion, we decided the only sensible thing to do with the re-dead undead was to eat them. A few experiments later, we discovered the only safe way to eat zombie corpses was to turn them into Zombie Jerky!

Zombie Jerky is a delicious way of dealing with the undead. Seriously, though, Zombie Jerky is really just tasty chunks of teriyaki beef jerky – accented with green stuff. Packaged in a neato specimen pouch, Zombie Jerky will prove to everyone that you’ll eat anything (and also earn you lots of grossed out looks). And all the while, you’ll know it’s not really ex-people. Or is it?!? Hey, zombies have been eating us for years – it’s time for us to return the favor with Zombie Jerky.

Available at Think Geek!

Zombie Food Shirt

You don’t often see what happens to the rest of the world when a zombie outbreak occurs. Being a selfish society we always tend to focus on just what happens to humanity. Someone has finally decided to explore at least one other thing on our planet that just may happen to get infected when the end of times come!

Available at Threadless!